We were having a discussion today on Romance Divas about fear and success, and it got me thinking.  One thing I’ve learned about fear is that conquering it doesn’t mean I don’t feel it.  I used to think that being brave meant that I wouldn’t feel fear, I’d somehow achieve this Zen state of serenity where I could do those things that frightened me without feeling any fear or anything scary.  Since that never happened, and I felt fear anyway, I never achieved that Zen state.

But what did happen was far more magical:  after some experiments in feeling the fear but moving forward despite it, when I did the thing that frightened me, I felt a great surge of serenity.  Isn’t that ironic?  I had to go through the fear to get the serenity – nothing else worked.  I couldn’t avoid it, or not do the thing that made me afraid, or any of a dozen other avoidance tactics.  It was only by going through that I got through.

What are some of your favorite coping mechanisms for dealing successfully with fear?

2 thoughts on “Writer Wednesday – Fear

  1. Oh, I can totally relate. Social anxiety causes me nervousness just walking through the doors of my health club. Once I get inside, put on headphones, and start the exercise the feeling fades. I'm all relaxed, smiling at everyone upon leaving.

    And speaking of headphones, music helps in all sorts of similar situations. It obviously wouldn't work for all types of fears, though, so I'll have to give this more thought. Thanks for sharing this inspiring tell!

  2. Grace Kahlo says:

    Music is my favorite thing to turn to, too, for everything actually. And breathing. That's always a good thing when dealing with a fear that roots you to the floor. 😛

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